Sometimes I see evidence of the torture heaped upon the English language and it just amuses the hell out of me.
A tag in a fabric shop
Vilma crampled cotton with sequence
A sign on the door of a public toilet/bathroom
Please plush the toilet.
In the furniture section of a department store
Do not shit on the chair.
And a conversation I overheard between a mother and her daughter
Daughter: What’s up with the weather today? It’s been raining continuously for four days!
Mom: Something must’ve happened out of this world.
Daughter: Huh? Don’t you mean something must’ve happened from out of our country?
Mom: Shut up! Split of my tongue.