A letter from our college promoting the latest fad that ever hit academia.
LET’S GET FIT!
We are starting a new program this year to help get & keep all faculty and staff fit
and well. We are even going to give all participants prizes for exercising.
In short, ____ has challenged the Faculty and Staff of _________ to
a fitness dual…..and we intend to win. Also, while participating in this challenge
you can earn a pedometer and a t-shirt for your efforts.
This really cracked me up. I just wish they’d rewards us a cool, oh let’s say $60 million which the rumored amount that was promised to Monica Lewinsky to make her lose 60 pounds then I’d definitely join. And what the heck is a pedometer?? And why would I want one while sweating my guts out?
Now I’ve sent a letter to my colleagues dazzling in its splendor of sarcasm proclaiming that I’d gladly join the program if they reward me with a cool million bucks like what the Jenny Craig fitness agency did to Lewinsky a few years back.
Unfortunately, for some reason they didn’t get it.
And now they all think I AM the ultimate champion of fitness.
They even came to drop by and apologize why they can’t join the fitness competition.
It boggles the mind.
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